Wednesday, July 02, 2003

Dennis Miller: The Ted Nugent of Comedy

Journey FROM the Center of the Mind

Money has a funny way of luring the weak from their minds and principles. Pay them enough and they will say anything. It's all about the money. Who cares if hell awaits. This is about me, me, me...

Over the past failures, Dennis Miller has finally landed at the last place where people will accept him. And this only because he says what he is told to say, the "official story", the lie of the day. Only his job is to make it sound funny.
Not a bad idea when you consider that if people felt the gravity of Bush's having put America into a nosedive, they would be jumping out of buildings.
Sheesh. Jumping out of buildings. Where have I seen that before? Oh yes, it was while visiting New York a couple of years ago in early September...

So your comedy, Mr. Miller. But know that you are now the Ted Nugent of Comedy. And that Ted Nugent was the Millard Fillmore of Rock.
And no...he's not the one from whom the Fillmore East and West got their name. You could have been a contender. A Clapton, a Santana, a Fripp, a Beck. A member of the Beatles or Radiohead. So many who completely overwhelm Ted Nugentski. Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Ted...

Let me explain something to you though. TV has experienced a brain-drain, ever since the Internet captured the sharper minds. That your attempts at liberality were met with disdain should not have been unexpected. Liberals don't watch Bravo, PBS, NOW, movie channels, and the more edifying and instructive shows. Certainly not least not in great numbers. For liberals, winning isn't everything. The truth and fair play are also important.

In other words, you should have moved once you found that you were in a bad neighborhood. Instead, you merged with the audience...who themselves had merged with Rush, O'Reilly, and the other would-be fuhrers of our Bush-initiated dark age. Hope you enjoy their company! BWAHAHAHAHAAA!

Sorry, but I have been there, and it is not a pretty sight. I consider Ann Coulter or Lisa Myers a babe! My God! Have you no shame? No standards?

But look. You were hilarious during the Comic Relief segments. Sure, you were surrounded by a bunch of damn liberals, but did you not feel the love? Does the love not count for anything? Why turn your back on the love, and join the camp of fear, it's opposite?

I'm afraid that, like Mr. Heston, you have alienated half of your original client-base. And the ones you now have will turn on you at the slightest gesture of liberality. Fear is as fear does. The rice paper upon which you walk is beginning to weaken from your clumsiness.

Humor, like the love, has the power to heal, and yet lies and fear do not. They destroy health and lives. Surely you have kept up with the casualty toll already exacted upon the Bushwatch... Thousands! Thousands whose families would much rather have a tryst in the White House than an empty place at the dinner table.

I know you think Bush is a killer President.
At least you're half right.

Time to come home, young man.
Time for all our young men, and women, to come home...


Now...enjoy some excellent satire from Buzzflash reader and contributor, David Monroe, MD: