Saturday, October 18, 2003

The Oxymoron List

The Oxymoron List

"No Child Left Behind" changes name to "No Child Lying Liars"

The "Left Behind" cult up in arms.

Clear Channel Doesn't Play Songs. It plays Jingles.

Talk about product placement! I can't even hear the Rascals anymore without seeing Peggy Fleming strut her skates for Claratin. Or is it Prilosec? Every drug these days has a song, and some are even good for you. Well, at least their harmful effects have yet to be ascertained. Some will hijack your brain, if you don't mind some company creating a product that will do so. Who NEEDS implants? We will install them ourselves. Through our mouths. After all it does bring them profits, and this is a capitalistic system. Suck it up. It's the way the game works. Drug dealers in suits and church. Rush's people. His brain was hijacked. Is yours?

When a station plays a song cum jingle, does it have to pay royalties to Smith-Kline? I have no idea, but figure that if it doesn't now, it will in the future. Well, there can be arrangements made...

Story is told how Kodak failed to see the wisdom of letting, if not encouraging, Paul Simon to create a song about Kodachrome. Of course they now see the benefit.

The practice, although bastardative, is fine with me...but I should think that artists might be more restrictive and selective about their song's eventual placement.

Now that people doubt the success of attempts at Liberal TV and Radio, their very doubt should be proof enough that their age-old accusation of the media's already being liberal is just so much hooey. Which reminds me. I want to append Whitman to read: "So I contradict myself. I am stupid." Maybe I should say "intellectually lazy". I'm not sure what it is that makes hypocricy so ubiquitous among the wingnuts. Maybe that's why they are called wingnuts!

My question then becomes: What product or service should have Einstein on the Beach?

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Hated Cub Fan Saves Girl's Life

Hailed as Hero of All Chicago Gals

If you examine the following picture, you will see that the Chicago fan, Steve Bartman, was, perhaps inadvertently, a life-saver. Remember how the very tolerable Ashley Judd got killed in Simon Birch? Steve Bartman would have saved her...and he did save the hapless fan in last night's game.

Well maybe...

I say be merciful on the poor fellow. It's only a game. Looks like the fielder would have missed it anyway. And imagine when Chicago actually does win...which may still happen. Watch the tape of Susan Lucci when she finally won. All the sweeter when it does come. And it will.

Be patient. As Augustine said, "The reward for patience is patience."
Hang in there, Cubs fans. I always pull for the underdog. The overdog is usually so arrogant...


Conservatism Unedited

Conservatism Unedited

Want to see into the "mind" of the Texas Republicans...unedited?
Check this out:

These are the internal emails. Not a pretty picture. Reminds me of the early days of the WWW before they learned about the spellchecker and the type-clean "received wisdom" from the RNC.

Here is but a sample of their famous compassion:

18 - Jackson-Lee - as much as we despise her, she cannot be drawn out. She still has the 5th ward and downtown Houston. The Queen lives!!!!

Faux News: Mother of All Bulls*it

...don't watch Fox News. The more you watch, the more you'll get things wrong.

...and I thought war was about decreasing the enemy!

Call me stupid, but I had thought that the US and the UK had launched this "war on terrorism" in order to decrease their numbers...not swell them!

I guess I was wrong. The bible tells me so...

The 2003-2004 edition of the British-based think-tank's annual bible for defense analysts, The Military Balance, said Washington's assertions after the Iraq conflict that it had turned the corner in the war on terror were "over-confident."

and in the first paragraph, Reuters says:

War in Iraq has swollen the ranks of al Qaeda and galvanized the Islamic militant group's will, the International Institute for Strategic Studies said on Wednesday in its annual report.

It is unfortunate that the Bush Administration has made the world a more dangerous place, by increasing the numbers of those who would harm us.
I frankly would rather have a world of friends than a world of enemies.

I guess those who make weapons needs to have people to swallow them.
Swallow them. Hmmm. An interesting metaphor. Kinda like medicine, pharmaceuticals. Something tells me there is red meat in that intuition somewhere. Someone should look into that. For while we fear biological and chemical abstracto... we may allow ourselves to put too much trust in everyday products...which are already killing us.

Why did Clinton bomb a pharmaceutical company? A favor to one of their competitors? See...I am not entirely partisan!

Someone needs to remove the greed gene from human beings. It has driven us to do absolutely heinous things, ungodly things, to satisfy it.

Do I digress?

If you do not agree with the Bush Doctrine of preemption, which has led to this escalation of can change it, and the world, at the election box. Any of the Democrats would do the trick, as they all, so to say, "work well with others"...and are true Peace Lovers...not, like the Bush weapon and oil cartel, purveyors of war.

War is not peace.

Two Nations Under God

Blogmeistress, Iddybud, has brought up some good points concerning the er...Pledge of Deference? Pledge of Obsequiousness? Pledge of Obeisance? Pledge of Rhetoric? What is that damn thing anyway? Oh yes...the almighty Pledge of Allegiance!

Americans are so fucking goofy sometimes. Here is this silly poem that some nobody scrawls for Highlights Magazine (or something like that), and before long it becomes something people are willing to kill to preserve.

Why not preserve "Leaves of Grass"? Clearly is is an infinitely better poem.
But to kill for it? I seriously doubt Walt Whitman would like that very much.
Nor do I suspect is the ghost of the writer of the almight Pledge of Allegiance all that happy about all these wingnuts rallying people to fight and kill for it.

I am not going to kill squat for a poem. I won't even do it for a bible.
Words only approximate. Translations make matters even worse. Editing worse still.

So while these ne'er-do-wells are all afluff on the matter...remember what an infantile waste of emotional energy these fools are expending...and do not allow yourself to be so fooled.

The very same people who are bitching about the words "under God" -- which, by the way, WAS appended in the 1950s by the then Falwells and Robertsons -- they seem to have forgotten the "One nation" part.

Ah selective memory!

The whole matter is childish...and a product of Mass Diversion Inc.
Not something you'd want to buy. A broken and bastardized product.
And if you must buy...stick to the original. It is authentic. Unretouched.

Unlike those who live to muddy the waters...

Some of the recent changes and improvements at Blogger.

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

Google Search: "Drudge"

Does Drudge Fudge?
Sometimes I will call up the Drudge Report and just sit back and admire it. Invariable, it will refresh itself after a minute or so. This peculiar phenomenon has caused us at Conspiracy Theories Inc. to wonder if he isn't inflating his numbers...automatically, if you will.

[Twilight Zone theme]


Sunday, October 12, 2003

Center for American Progress article in NYT

Center for American Progress article in NYT


Podesta laid out his plan for what he likes to call a ''think tank on steroids.'' Emulating those conservative institutions, he said, a message-oriented war room will send out a daily briefing to refute the positions and arguments of the right. An aggressive media department will book liberal thinkers on cable TV. There will be an ''edgy'' Web site and a policy shop to formulate strong positions on foreign and domestic issues. In addition, Podesta explained how he would recruit hundreds of fellows and scholars -- some in residence and others spread around the country -- to research and promote new progressive policy ideas. American Progress is slated to operate with a $10 million budget next year, raised from big donors like the financier George Soros.

Contact me!
- Anon