How to make Alec Baldwin out of Claude Akins and Roy Blunt

Women always ask me: "How can I make Alec Baldwin"? Usually I have no response, and throw up my hands...which is a lot better than throwing up on your hands. But today, I have discovered the answer: Morph trucking actor Claude Akins and Congressman Roy Blunt. (Some people claim they are the same person, so you may want to morph pictures of the two, rather than morphing their actual bodies, which may indeed be the same one.

Above is what happens when you morph their pictures...

Democrats let Republicans Seize Alternative Energy, Innovation

Republicans Seize the Future, but is it a Snake Oil Symphony?

What could have been a winning formula for Democrats was usurped last night, and the result is that The Republican Party will now be synonymous with alternative energy, innovation, creativity. Yet another miracle is born in our topsy-turvy BushWorld.

You snooze, you lose. Poor Democrats. Poor Paddy Dignam.

Now, if the Democrats can hold Bush to his word, they too might be able to ride the coattails and be seen as at least marginally important in the development of alternative energy, innovation and creativity, as well as the future -- four categories that were once strongly identified with the Democratic Party.

Meanwhile, Democrats are busy becoming Republicans by embracing God, Guns and Goofiness.

For his part, Governor Tim Kaine gave a very good response with more substance and authenticity than Mister Bush, thus propelling this talented Democrat favorably into the national spotlight.

SOTU: Confident? Prepare to be challenged.

In his State of the Union Address, Bush vows to create an agenda that competes with confidence.

A beautiful tribute to Coretta Scott King by Iddybud

Jude Nagurney-Camwell on Coretta Scott King

BULLETIN! Bush/Abramoff Photos discovered by Anonymoses

Remember...I don't know you.

(See: "in the Biblical sense")

"I did not have verbal relations with that man." - GW Bush

BUSH’S STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS TO BE SIMULCAST IN ENGLISH

President Hopes to Reach Broader Audience, Aides Say

For the first time since he was elected President of the United States, George W. Bush’s State of the Union address tonight will be simulcast in English, the White House confirmed.

With the president’s approval ratings sagging, the decision to simulcast the speech in English was widely seen as an attempt by the president to make an appeal to a broader audience.

More on this breaking news from the Borowitz Report

(hat tip to Rah Bourbon)

George W. (Phat) Robertson

Pat Your Bush

The REAL State of the Union

The America We Believe In
John Edwards

Mrs. Martin Luther King has died

Coretta Scott King

Coretta Scott King's Accomplishments Included a Syndicated Column
NEW YORK Coretta Scott King, who died overnight at age 78, lived a memorable life. But one thing many people may not remember is that she wrote a weekly column for the New York Times Syndicate during the mid-1980s.

Dark Dubya

Bush morphing into dark double

"Ah-mad-in-e-jad. Not to be comfused with I'm mad and in a jam."

Yale finally comes clean

Infamous university finally discovers the wonders of soap
"I think it's great that people have soap."

After centuries of unclean living, Yale University has now decided to change its stripes, and join the ranks of Harvard, Haverford and Chapel Hill -- centers of higher cleanliness. We predict, however, that the change will have a detrimental effect on their sports teams, since it was usually the smell which facilitated any victory that might happen along. Here's to clean learning!

Music for a Sunday Midwinter Night

Sunday is a time for reflection. Or maybe it was refraction. I'll have to get back on that. Anyway, Sunday is good for something, I just can't remember. Oh yeah. Jesus. How could I forget? Music! Music for God's sake!

Or maybe it was for God's snake. The mad cow. Denny Crane!

Since you are not privy to my library, let me offer you a reasonable alternative.
It's called Echoes. And was probably named after the Floyd song with the same name.
And no, not Cramer. And not the barber. Except on T-shirts.

In Charlotte, it is on FM 90.7, WFAE. The station that caters to the ejikated classes.

Here are highlights from Echoes' playlist for tonight:
(Ignore that it says it's from Wednesday. They must replay it at night or something.)

-Thomas Newman (composer of the soundtracks for The Player, Jarhead, and American Beauty, among others.)
- Tinh
- R Carlos Nakai and Keola Beamer
- Dean De Benedictis
- Peppino D'Agostino and Stef Burns
- Takashi Kohgo
- Blue Stone
- Anja Lechner and Vasillis Tsabropoulos
- Bombay Dub Orchestra
- Bochum Welt
- Dungen
- Sophie Barker
- Richard Bone
- Harp 46
- Archetribe

Granted, not the most memorable of names. But soul-revivifying music, in the main.


Covering Morrocone at the moment...

Movies for a Sunday Afternoon

"Roman Holiday" and "It Happened One Night", two of the best movies of all time, will be on today at 2pm and 4pm. If you're not busy, you ought to watch them. They will make you a better person. Swear! You can catch them on the great Turner Classic Movies (TCM).

"Roman Holiday" stars Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn, as well as a young Eddie Albert, and features the famous scene of Peck putting his hand into to mouth in the wall, shocking Ms. Hepburn when he removes his arm...handless. My own father used to do this to us kids, and people say he looked a lot like Mr. Peck.

"It Happened One Night" stars Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert in surely their funniest roles. The movie won more academy awards than any since its own win in the late 1930s. It is said that the sale of T-shirts plummeted after this movie came out. (Clark strips at one point, and he is not wearing upper undergarments.)

Both movies are entirely 5-star affairs, and will surely become one of your own favorites. All four of the principals are sublime.

If you can...tape it. You'll want to share, just as I do...

ABC's Woodruff, cameraman injured in Iraq

BREAKING NEWS


Bob Woodruff Injured in Iraq IED explosion

NEW YORK - ABC News anchor Bob Woodruff and a cameraman were seriously injured Sunday in an explosion while reporting from Iraq, the network said Sunday.
Woodruff and cameraman Doug Vogt were hit by an improvised explosive device near Taji, Iraq, and were in serious condition at a U.S. military hospital, ABC News President David Westin said.

The last time I saw Mr. Woodruff on Friday night, I remember him to have an apprehensive look on his face as he said he was going to be reporting from Iraq.

Was he prescient, or are things even worse than they are being portrayed, and Bob knew it?

Our prayers are with these brave gentlemen. May they have a speedy recovery.